The Pillsbury Doughboy Died

Via The Pillsbury Doughboy Died

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, The Pillsbury Doughboy, died

yesterday of a severe yeast infection and complications

from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a slightly greased coffin. Dozens

of celebrities turned out, including Mrs. Butterworth,

the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, the

Hostess Twinkies, and many others. The graveside was

piled high in flours as longtime friend Aunt Jemima

delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a man who

“never knew how much he was kneaded”.

Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later

life was filled with many turnovers. He was not

considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his

dough on half-baked schemes. Still, even as a crusty

old man, he was a roll model to millions. Doughboy is

survived by his second wife, Play Dough. They have two

children and one in the oven. The funeral was held at

350 for about twenty minutes.


Leave a Reply