Top medical acronyms

Via the BBC: Doctor slang is a dying art. And you thought geek slang was insulting! Here are a few choice terms:

CTD – Circling the Drain (A patient expected to die soon)

GLM – Good looking Mum

GPO – Good for Parts Only

TEETH – Tried Everything Else, Try Homeopathy

UBI – Unexplained Beer Injury

TTFO – an expletive expression roughly translated as “Told To Go Away”

LOBNH (Lights On But Nobody Home),

CNS-QNS (Central Nervous System – Quantity Not Sufficient),

Pumpkin Positive – which refers to the implication that a penlight shone into the patient’s mouth would encounter a brain so small that the whole head would light up.

Digging for Worms – varicose vein surgery

Departure lounge – geriatric ward

Handbag positive – confused patient (usually elderly lady) lying on hospital bed clutching handbag

Woolworth’s Test – Anaesthetic term (if you can imagine patient shopping in Woolies, it’s safe to give a general anaesthetic)

Freud Squad” are psychiatrists, and “Gassers” and “Slashers” are anaesthetists and general surgeons respectively.


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