Via the BBC: Doctor slang is a dying art. And you thought geek slang was insulting! Here are a few choice terms:
CTD – Circling the Drain (A patient expected to die soon)
GLM – Good looking Mum
GPO – Good for Parts Only
TEETH – Tried Everything Else, Try Homeopathy
UBI – Unexplained Beer Injury
TTFO – an expletive expression roughly translated as “Told To Go Away”
LOBNH (Lights On But Nobody Home),
CNS-QNS (Central Nervous System – Quantity Not Sufficient),
Pumpkin Positive – which refers to the implication that a penlight shone into the patient’s mouth would encounter a brain so small that the whole head would light up.
Digging for Worms – varicose vein surgery
Departure lounge – geriatric ward
Handbag positive – confused patient (usually elderly lady) lying on hospital bed clutching handbag
Woolworth’s Test – Anaesthetic term (if you can imagine patient shopping in Woolies, it’s safe to give a general anaesthetic)
Freud Squad” are psychiatrists, and “Gassers” and “Slashers” are anaesthetists and general surgeons respectively.